I seriously love having other people do the heavy lifting around here.
To that end I have decided to publish a guest post by weezie, who by the way, is also responsible for the cleaner, easier-to-read template.
So, many thanks to weezie and here ya go!
I came across the idea of Compersion a few weeks ago as it drifted around the internet. I immediately jumped on Wikipedia to find out what it meant, and was taken off-guard. How had I not heard of this before?
The basic concept of the word is that it is the opposite of jealousy. So, if you break up with your significant other, and you are happy for them finding someone else – that’s Compersion. With a few leaps of logic you can extend it out to many facets of Kink – it seems like the whole concept of compersion might be mixed in with the mortar.
Here’s an example: As a submissive man, one of my personal kinks – the one most important to me – is keeping my partner happy. When a submissive’s happiness is dependent on their dominant’s happiness, and the dominant is happier (at least for some things) elsewhere… that’s a complicated event. It can hurt, but it can also be happy. Heck, if a dominant spends more time watching TV than paying their sub attention, it still has potential to be a good thing.
We just have to be careful not to venture into neglect territory.
It’s funny how society dictates how we should feel. When my past partners have smooched others, I felt a bit of happiness within me – but my mind reeled back through all the movies and TV shows I’ve seen over the years, and said “Wait! I should be angry! I should be scared! I should get upset! I SHOULD BE JEALOUS!” We are simply molds that are largely shaped by the society we live in.
I always felt that I could handle a poly relationship, in my gut. I couldn’t express why. Compersion has given me the answer. I don’t need to be the sole happiness-provider in a relationship, and I can truly, deep down, be happy with people pleasuring themselves elsewhere.
Now that I know Compersion exists, I can identify those happy feelings. I can give them a name, I can nurture them, and I can take my submission to a whole new level. Thanks, internet, for introducing this beautiful new word to me.
And look at that: I didn’t even have to talk about cuckolding, which seems to be all about this.